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  • #7010273
    ZERO replies from 661 emails.
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Oct 27, 2022

    Hi Everyone, it’s fantastic to join this community – thanks Will.

    I’ve sent 4 emails to 4 groups of circa 50 people e.g Marketing Director, Media Director etc all in the US from similar sized companies – trying to keep this as similar as possible with about a 2 or 3 day delay between emails. They’ve been sent during the day mostly.

    I’ve had 0 replies (good or bad) from 661 emails.

    Here are the email titles and content I’m sending:

    Title 1: Improve the performance of your digital ads by 60% – (Open Rate 27.85% )

    Content:

    We just helped Nivea reduce their cost per visit by 60% and explained what was working (and what was killing their CPC).

    Adam Wright (Nivea Head of Digital) was just singing our praises too (there’s a hyperlink – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiW8Seolco8)

    Our tech helps marketers at Unilever, P&G, GSK, Bose, Diageo and KFC improve ad performance without relying on brainless AI.

    Does it make sense to jump on a call to talk through what we do?

    Tom

    Title 2: How to take the bias out of creative decisions – (Open Rate 33.40%)

    Content:

    I interviewed Sir Martin Sorrell on a podcast and he said many brands are “stuck in the analogue era.”

    I told him we use automation to improve their marketing performance and tell brands why their ads work.

    We have helped PensionBee decrease their CPA by 19.17% and help them understand the DNA of their top creative.

    Their CMO said “We’re seeing good results and the data is reshaping our above the line campaigns.”

    Does it make sense to have a call about Automated Creative? (with a hyperlink to this – https://automatedcreative.net/creds-video-and-deck)

    Tom

    Title 3: A recession is on the way. Get the same results for a smaller media budget – (Open Rate 42.93%)

    Hey, how’s going?

    I was chatting to Jack Hinchliffe the KFC CMO who said they needed to make their media budget more effective.

    Since then Automated Creative have improved their media efficiency by 45%.

    Here’s Jack talking onstage about how this worked. (Hyperlink to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEd1yag6jGw)

    Does it make sense to have a call about this?

    Tom

    Title 4: P&G Double Sales using Automated Creative – (Open Rate – 39.50%)

    Content:

    This is important.

    P&G have doubled sales of Herbal Essences by using Automated Creative.

    It works.

    Enough said.

    (Screenshot of the campaign creative and data/graphs etc)

    Shall we talk about how this could work for you?

    Tom

    Please can the lovely folk in this group show me where I’m going wrong?

    Thanks

    Tom

    #7010275
    Lauren Bailey
    Participant
    Oct 27, 2022
    Lauren Bailey Oct 27, 2022

    Hi Tom! I’m sure the Salesman.org team will be in here shortly a couple of things stuck out of me like a sore thumb.

    Your subject lines are too long. The litmus test for me is to email the email to myself and see if I can read the subject line on my iPhone. I think it’s around 40 characters. With that said, 40% open rates are within acceptable range.

    The first lines need to be personalised. “We just helped Nivea reduce their cost per visit by 60% and explained what was working (and what was killing their CPC).” Put yourself in the buyers shoes. They’re probably thinking “yeah, so…”

    I’d be saying “I see that you’re doing PPC on XYZ platform. Costs are getting expensive, right?” Then “you’re in the same market as XYZ, we just reduced their cost per visit by 60%” and the final line “Would it make sense to jump on a quick call to see if we can do the same for you?”

    – Attention
    – Social proof
    – CTA

    Finally, in a lot of markets, when your prospects are damn busy people, 4 unpersonalised emails just isn’t enough to get attention. It’s going to take 6-8 touches including adding people on LinkedIn etc to book calls.

    I hope that helps!!

    #7010276
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Oct 27, 2022
    Tom Ollerton Oct 27, 2022

    Hi Lauren, thanks so much for taking the time to reply to me.

    *rolls sleeves up and goes back to the mines*

    #7010278
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Oct 27, 2022
    Will Barron Oct 27, 2022

    I echo all of what Lauren says here Tom.

    – shorter subject lines
    – personalised first line
    – more activity

    Jump on one of the group coaching calls and we can run through this in real time.

    The first part of today’s call with Rizwan we covered some similar issues – https://app.salesman.com/Community/topic/coaching-call-27-10-22/

    For each line of your email, ask yourself –

    – would the person care?
    – is it specific to them?
    – does this solve a big enough pain point that their boss would kick off if they didn’t take the call
    – does it make sense without having any context of your product?

    Here’s an example that we send when we see sales headcount decreasing on LinkedIn the time that books meetings –

    Hi NAME,

    I see your sales team head count just decreased.

    We help salespeople find and close more deals in the next 30 days or your money back.

    I think you might be a good fit for us. Would it make sense to jump on a quick call to see if we can get your team closing more with less?

    Thanks,

    Does that give you a little to go on Tom?

    #7010279
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Oct 28, 2022
    Tom Ollerton Oct 28, 2022

    Thanks Will, thanks Lauren for your feedback.

    How about this?

    ——–

    Title: Grow market share by 2%

    ——–

    Hi {FIRST NAME}

    We’re going into a recession and growing your brand next year will be tough.

    We helped Mondelez increase their market share by 2% by using creative automation.

    “We’re absolutely thrilled with the results we’ve achieved”
    – Miguel Reyes, Senior Brand Manager, Mondelez.

    Does it make sense to have a five minute call to discuss this?

    Tom

    #7010280
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Oct 28, 2022
    Will Barron Oct 28, 2022

    You’re making assumptions that we’re going to into a recession and that growing will be tough. Probably true but you don’t know that until you speak with the prospect.

    This is too broad and not specific enough to the prospect for them to go “ah, this person has done some research and might be able to solve I problem I have”.

    I think you need to simplify this further Tom.

    What’s your one line value prop from the workshop? i.e. We help X, do Y with Z.

    Lets build an email from that.

    #7010281
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Oct 28, 2022
    Tom Ollerton Oct 28, 2022

    Thanks Will. Right. I’ve sharpened it a bit and taken a different angle.

    Hi XXX

    The World Federation of Advertisers research shows brands will be moving 28% more of their budget into performance marketing during the recession.

    Automated Creative helps advertisers double performance media effectiveness with creative automation.

    Here’s what P&G have to say about it.

    “Automated Creative delivered conversion results which are the highest I’ve ever seen – upwards of 10%!” – Chetna Soni – Senior Brand Director, Haircare, P&G

    Does it make sense to have a short call to see if we can deliver this for you?

    Tom

    #7010282
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Oct 28, 2022
    Will Barron Oct 28, 2022

    Getting much closer now. Get rid of that first line –

    Hi XXX

    We help advertisers DOUBLE performance media effectiveness with creative automation.

    Here’s what P&G have to say about it.

    “Automated Creative delivered conversion results which are the highest I’ve ever seen – upwards of 10%!” – Chetna Soni – Senior Brand Director, Haircare, P&G

    [COMPANY NAME] is a good fit for our system. Does it make sense to have a short call to see if we can deliver this for you?

    Tom

    Couple of ways to improve this –

    – Can you remove the buzz words from the first line? “We will double the effectiveness of your PPC ad spend.” That’s enough to get most peoples attention.
    – You say double in the first line but then “10%” in the second. I get it, you took them from 5% to 10% but those numbers aren’t easy to correlate at a glance.
    – So could we say “I think our AI tool can double your PPC conversion rates”?

    If you managed PPC would you reply to this? –

    Hi XXX

    I think our AI tool can double your PPC conversion rates.

    We’ve just done it with P&G –

    “Automated Creative delivered conversion results which are the highest I’ve ever seen – upwards of 10%!” – Chetna Soni – Senior Brand Director

    [COMPANY NAME] looks like s a good fit for our tool.

    Does it make sense to have a short call to see if we can do the same for you?

    Tom

    #7010283
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Oct 31, 2022
    Tom Ollerton Oct 31, 2022

    Thanks for the suggestions Will.

    I’ve sent out a few tests, so keen to know what will come back.

    #7510300
    Eli A
    Participant
    Nov 11, 2022
    Eli A Nov 11, 2022

    Hi Tom,

    Will pretty much nailed it. Everything is way too long.

    They cant really see the subject line pass 3-4 words, and they are not reading past three sentences.

    Hook them with the first line by personalizing and targeting their specific pains.

    Aim for three words on the subject line, and for a three sentence body including the CTA.

    Test the efficacy of your cadences with small groups of ICPs at a time so you don’t burn through your TAM.

    Good luck!

    Liam

    #7510314
    Tom Ollerton
    Member
    Nov 22, 2022
    Tom Ollerton Nov 22, 2022

    UPDATE – 1 reply from 508 new emails.

    Thanks to the community for sharing your tips, but something isn’t working.

    Here’s the advice:

    Advice 1. Make the subject lines shorter!

    Old version “A recession is on the way. Get the same results for a smaller media budget.”
    New version “Double your online sales.”

    I did this and the Open Rate has gone down from 36.25% to 36.16% for the same audiences.

    Advice 2. Start again on your content.

    I took a direct steer from Will (thanks for that) and tried this format:

    Hi XXX

    I think our AI tool can double your online sales.

    We’ve just done it for P&G:

    “Automated Creative delivered conversion results which are the highest I’ve ever seen – upwards of 10%!” – Chetna Soni / Senior Brand Director

    Does it make sense to have a short call to see if we can do the same for you?

    Tom

    I still got 0 replies to this new format.

    The only reply I got was when I used this template – https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1mw0BvYjVRPxji0V0euG1KMDoMbBXD1WMKFYajnkQ0cw/edit#slide=id.p

    So I’ve been continuing with this but still not getting anywhere.

    I am burning A LOT of time on this and not seeing any responses and ultimately damaging my own brand with an a stream of sales messages.

    I’d like to get some advice on what I should experiment with next.

    Thanks

    Tom

    #7510315
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Nov 22, 2022
    Will Barron Nov 22, 2022

    It’s a decent email and so there might be an issue else where. Can you feedback on –

    – How many emails have you send in step-by-step cadence?
    – Who are these emails going to? ICP etc
    – Where are you getting their emails from?
    – Are you “cleaning” the email list before you send them out? If you’re scraping emails then this is a must (https://www.bulkemailchecker.com/)
    – Have you checked inbox deliverablity? (https://www.mail-tester.com/)

    I wouldn’t think you’re doing any harm to your brand with that message. That would fit perfectly in PPC and so won’t offend anyone.

    Based on the above the next steps could be –

    – Personalise first line
    – Narrow ICP
    – Clean emails or use different tool to aquire them
    – Much longer cadence if only sending one email

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