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  • #9515803
    New Email Copy Review
    Abhijeet Sarkar
    Participant
    Sep 8, 2023

    Hey community – would love to get your feedback on this cold email I’m about to send:

    Hey {{FIRST_NAME}},

    As a fellow president / founder I know how difficult it is to grow sales and operations profitably.

    But did you know that as an agency who delivers insights, reporting and analysis, {{COMPANY}} could potentially add 1-2 client’s worth of revenue at 50% or higher margin?

    At TypeSift, we help agencies achieve this by consolidating their reporting / analytics under our platform, which they white-label and resell.

    This drops your costs for client reporting, adds new revenue through software resale, and builds higher customer satisfaction, loyalty and retention by featuring your branding.

    {{FIRST_NAME}}, can you reply and let me know if you’re:

    A) Open to a Zoom call to see if this will work for {{COMPANY}}

    B) Not interested

    Thank you!

    —Ab

    #9515804
    Abhijeet Sarkar
    Participant
    Sep 8, 2023
    Abhijeet Sarkar Sep 8, 2023

    My only worry about this is giving away a bit of the secret sauce in the 3rd sentence (At TypeSift, we help…). Not sure what else I could say but I obviously want to generate enough curiosity for them to book a meeting.

    #9515807
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Sep 11, 2023
    Will Barron Sep 11, 2023

    Hey Abhitjeet. I’ve moved your post to the Asset Review section.

    Few thoughts –

    • “Hi” rather than “Hey” has worked better in our testing. End users maybe Hey is OK. Execs? I’d use Hi.
    • I hate the CTA and that’s better saved for emails later in the cadence where you’re trying to get a response at all costs.
    • “reporting/analytics” “sales and operations” “insights, reporting, analysis” – Pick one and it’ll make the message stronger. You can always include the other one in a follow up.
    • Few opportunities to simplify. I’ve tried to reduce as much as possible below.
    • This line is a little confusing “But did you know that as an agency who delivers reporting, {{COMPANY}} could potentially add 1-2 client’s worth of revenue at 50% or higher margin?”. If you’re including numbers or juxtaposing data it should be really clear.
    • If all I got was this message, I’d be unclear on your value prop. Are you selling a tool to simplify and white label my reporting? Does your tool add more data that I can sell back to my customers? Is this a productivity tool? Is this a retention tool?

     

    Hi {{FIRST_NAME}},

    As a fellow [TITLE] I know how difficult it is to scale operations.

    We help [INDUSTRY] agencies both scale and drive more revenue from the reporting they’re already doing for clients.

    With the magic of our tool, we’ll consolidate your data, white-label it and enable you to resell it.

    Typically we add 1-2 client’s worth of revenue with no extra effort.

    Would it make sense to jump on a quick call to see if we can do the same for you?

    Thanks,

    [NAME]

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