• This topic has 1 reply, 2 voices, and was last updated 10 months ago by Will Barron.
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  • #9516205
    First Cadence
    Frederik Bonde
    Participant
    Nov 14, 2023

    Day 0

    • Email #1 — Main value proposition

    Subject: NAME — avoid mistakes and unnecessary costs?

    Body: Hello [NAME],

    We help webshops avoid logistical errors 99.8% of the time. This leads to positive reviews on Trust Pilot and fewer unnecessary costs, allowing owners to focus on sales and growth.

    In contrast to the typical problems with inefficient warehousing or running their own warehouse.

    Would it make sense to book a short meeting to see if we are a good fit?

    Best regards, Frederik // ShipShip

    Day 2

    • Email #2 — New angle on the value proposition

    Subject: Too many good reviews?

    Body: Hello [NAME],

    We are working with a quite exciting webshop at the moment.

    They can barely keep up with the demand for their products as their customers constantly (try to) deplete their inventory.

    Would you like to hear how they ran into this problem?

    Best, Frederik

    Day 4

    • Call
    • Voicemail to explain that I’ll send an email
    • Email #3 — Reference call in the email

    Subject: Couldn’t get hold of you

    Body: [NAME] — tried to reach you, but couldn’t get through.

    I believe there’s a chance to avoid warehouse errors 99% of the time and at the same time increase your profits.

    Does it make sense for a short talk?

    Best, Frederik

    Day 6

    • Email #4 — Short SMS-style email

    Subject: Significantly reduce fixed costs

    Body: I know how critical it is for webshops to be cost-effective.

    I know how you can save even more.

    How about a short talk tomorrow?

    Best, Frederik

    Day 8

    • Call
    • Voicemail
    • Email #5 — Dream reality & Ask for a meeting

    Subject: NAME — Grow your webshop (easy-mode)

    Body: Hello [NAME],

    All webshop owners essentially want the same things.

    • To sell a product their customers love
    • To grow the business and increase market share
    • To avoid operational headaches

    If I can guarantee that we can help with 2 of the 3 points, would it make sense for a short call?

    Best, Frederik

    Day 14

    • Email #6 — Uncommon Insight

    Subject: E-commerce industry is not as you think

    Body: Hello [NAME],

    Since the Boston Computer Exchange was founded in 1982, the e-commerce industry has undergone several shifts.

    In 2023, paid marketing, optimization of buying journeys, and solid branding are talked about as the most important success criteria for a webshop.

    However, there is an underlying aspect that is often overlooked. Streamlined logistics and scalable warehouse operations.

    The webshops that see the greatest success typically analyze their warehouse operations once a quarter.

    I have developed a step-by-step solution that lays the foundation for a successful growth strategy.

    Would it make sense to go through it in a short meeting?

    Best, Frederik

    Day 19

    • Call
    • Voicemail
    • Email #7 — Short follow-up on phone call

    Subject: Call

    Body: NAME — Tried to reach you earlier.

    Will follow up again tomorrow.

    • Frederik

    Day 20

    • Email #8 — Break-up

    Subject: ⚡ Changing times ⚡

    Body: NAME — The e-commerce industry is rapidly evolving.

    I tried to reach out to share some insights on how you can best handle it, but have not been successful in catching you.

    Have I misunderstood your role in the company?

    <!– notionvc: 9d500417-37b8-4ca2-aaaf-e54849ea05f3 –>

    #9516218
    Will Barron
    Keymaster
    Nov 14, 2023
    Will Barron Nov 14, 2023

    Hey Frederik,

    Are these emails going out as they are in English or are you translating them?

    If they’re going out in English, there’s probably a few additional changes I’d make to how they’re written. It’s probably nothing to worry about though if you’re going to translate them.

    They’re decent!

    Here’s some feedback rather than full rewrites –

    Day 0:

    Make sure it’s clear that you’re not calling their current solution shit. People have ego’s and don’t like being told they’ve done a bad job.

    A better way of doing it might be – “I see that you’ve had some recent growth. That usually means new problems. We help…”

    Day 2:

    Can you share the webshop you’re working with or some metrics? Numbers make claims/social proof way more powerful.

    I’m not sure the subject line (reviews) ties into the email (efficiency). Maybe do something like – “Becoming too efficient?”

    Day 4:

    You’re assuming they have lots of errors. Maybe pose it in a question – “If I could guarantee to eliminate 99% of warehouse errors, would it make sense to jump on a quick call?”

    Day 6:

    Take you out of it. That makes the statement more powerful as it’s harder to argue against – “It’s critical for webshops to be cost efficient”

    Day 8:

    Nice email. Good job.

    Day 14:

    Not sure on this but it’s a good pattern interrupt. Keep it in an see what results you get.

    Day 19:

    Good.

    Day 20:

    This is a little “I know better than you”. Tone it down a little –

    Hi NAME,

    I’ve tried to connect over the past couple of weeks but I’ve not managed to catch you.

    Have you got your warehousing 100% nailed?

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