#1 I help finance executives solve the problem of unchecked growth in telecom expenses. I do this by applying state of the art analysis to the issue.
I’d avoid calling the persons issue, their “issue”. People don’t like to be told that they’ve got problems.
I’d also tag on the buyers “desire” to the first line. In the example below I used “expansion” but it could be whatever goal you think the business is pushing towards.
Finally, I combined the last bit of your second value proposition to reduce the risk in meeting with you (no need to change vendors).
We help finance executives reduce the unchecked growth in telecom expenses to free up cash for expansion. I do this with painless, fast, state of the art bill analysis, without the need to change telecom vendors.
