The goal here is to A/B test your current emails vs. some that use our process.
I’m sure there will be some improvement BUT what you’re doing is working to a certain extent and so we keep your emails as the “A” and we keep creating “B’s” to beat them.
- The messaging is very focus on you. I think we’ll get stronger results focusing on the prospect.
- You don’t make a strong hypothesis of the pain the buyers is currently in. This means that it’s hard for the prospect to agree that you’ve sent the right message, to the right person.
- They’re quite presumptive – “By now, you may be already familiar with Fintech…”
- Offer of a discount at the end sounds desperate. Save this for a lat minute campaign when we really are trying to scrape together the last few deals in a timely way.
- Weak CTAs. “Does it make sense to talk” for example. Talk about what?
- Quit stuff like this “I am excited to hear from you soon” as it smells salesy.
- Finally you’re explaining too much. There is no curiosity. They can read your email, view the brochure and then never bother to contact as they’re making a decision whether to purchase offline. Give them a reason to connect with you.