#9516183
Will Barron
Keymaster
Nov 13, 2023
Will Barron Nov 13, 2023

Sorry for the slow reply here Justin.

You’re 100% on the right tracks and this is much better than what you were sending previously.

Some notes:

I briefly looked through your LinkedIn profile and noticed that you have extensive knowledge and background in direct mail and marketing. Would this currently be something that is outsourced by your company?

Be clear in your hypothesis. Are they outsourcing or not? It appears like spam if you’re just emailing everyone regardless.

Also, what are they outsourcing? It took me a couple of reads to get that it’s the printing specifically and not to design, campaign building etc that is being outsources.

Additionally, one CTA/question per email.

We recently helped (company X) save up to 12K per year on marketing collateral that was previously being outsourced, see the attached case study.

They didn’t ask for a case study. You work for a great company, you don’t need to provide proof unless they ask for it.

Be specific rather than saying “up to”.

As I’m sure you will know,

This makes them sound dumb for outsourcing, even if in hindsight it wasn’t the right solution.

Instead, pitch that there has been a change in the market. Outsourcing used to be smart, now there is an alternative solution… build intrigue with the curiosity loop –

Finally, write more like you speak. Something like this –

Subject:

(Name) – Expensive?

Email:

Hi (Name)

I looked at your LinkedIn profile and noticed you have a background in direct mail. It seems that you’re outsourcing your printing right now.

Until recently that was the obvious way to go about things.

However, I just helped (company X) save 12K per year printing their marketing collateral without outsourcing.

Would it make sense to jump on a quick call and I’ll explain how we did it?

Thanks,